Spiking the office Xmas party punchbowl and ‘Is there Still Sex in the City?’
This week’s giveaway is Helen Hoang’s novel, ‘The Heart Principle’
Ever toyed with the idea of writing a novel and self-publishing? Then you’ll be especially, extremely interested in the third and final instalment of my interview with my lovely gothic writer friend Rosalie in this issue. She talks about the mechanics of how you do it and how you feel once a book you’ve been working on for years is finally released into the world/wild. I’m so happy she’s done it and found it fascinating (if a tad daunting) to find out how the behind-the-scenes happens. There are people to help you, though, and Rosalie’s words to guide you. Ace!
Anyway, there’s plenty more to mull over this week, so let’s get to it.
News
1. Good on Chris Hemsworth for deciding he’ll take time off to focus on family following genetic testing for a show recently revealed he has a predisposition for developing Alzheimer’s. It’s not inevitable that he’ll get Alzheimer’s, as part of the equation is also lifestyle factors like staying in a healthy weight range and remaining mentally active. The revelation does raise the question of whether preventative genetic testing is the future of medicine in Australia. Sometimes knowledge of what lies latent in your genes is helpful, if distressing, if there are ways to head off these potential problems at the pass. But what if you can’t do a goddamn thing about it? Or worse, what if treatments are available, but you don’t have access to them due to a lack of money or enormous waiting lists? Maybe we should fix the hospital and Medicare system before we offer people crystal-ball-gazing they can’t act on.
2. A super-exciting move in the right direction towards closing the gender pay gap – pay secrecy policies have now been banned in Australia. I get that in some workplaces, being transparent about what everyone earns could lead to infighting, but I reckon the good this brings will outweigh the bad. Also, it looks like it won’t only benefit women, but other people who might not have the strongest bargaining power in employment situations. You beauty.
Reviews
1. Every now and then – hopefully not often – you’ll have a year where the universe just seems to want to repeatedly punt you in the lady-balls. For me, that year was 2020 (strangely, nothing to do with the beginnings of certain worldwide pandemic). In Is There Still Sex in the City? Candace Bushnell explores this theme in relation to middle age and dating. The novel is a blend of autobiography and fiction and asks: can you find happiness and rebuild after your life has dumped on you – having gone through divorce, job loss, ill-health, death of loved ones, and other disasters? What would your painted-and-pasted-over future look like? It’s a look at how dating practices have evolved (hellllooooo, Tinder!) since the main character last entered the merry-go-round and a realistic picture of what might come next. Well worth a read.
2. The author of this Guardian piece pulls no punches, and good on her too: ‘My boyfriend, a writer, broke up with me because I’m a writer’. It reminds me of this corker advice from Anne Lamott:
And I agree with that 100, 1,000, 10,000%. If people behave badly towards you, you don’t owe them a goddamn thing, least of all your silence. The type of people who demand you curb your words fear and resent accountability. Maybe writing memoir pieces is one way I keep these people in check, as a warning to others to be kind. No one who’s treated me well has ever obsessed over what I’ll write about them, because they know I’ll write the truth and they’re secure in the knowledge they’ll come out looking okay. Whether you’re a writer or not, though, and especially if you’re a woman or identify as female, chances are you know the feeling of trying to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm in a relationship. Of making yourself smaller, less successful, less obvious, less enviable, less vocal. That ain’t it.
3. When I’m in a New York state of mind, I can’t help gazing longingly at this list of essential NYC dishes. A blueberry buttermilk doughnut sounds heavenly, as does the celery and date salad with walnuts and shaved alpine cheese on top – despite being a salad. Also, I’d give the zucchini pizza (mixed with Gruyere) a crack.
Q&A
with gothic horror author R A Wodecki (Part 3)
We’re now on to the third and final instalment continued from last week and part one of my interview with my friend and fab gothic author Rosalie about her new book, The Castle – Diary of a Lost Woman.
Here’s us: me on the left performing some strange contortion with my body, Rosalie on the right looking fab. : )
Beck: Tell us about going down the self-publishing route
Rosalie: Well, you write a book, that's the big one. You write it, you get feedback, you redraft, you edit, and you think about your audience. So you be your own publisher all the way along, even if you haven't decided that's what you're doing, you get ready for those questions. What does a publisher want to know? How's it going to sell? Who are you selling it to? Does it fit in the genre? And yes, you could write a phenomenal book that doesn't fit a category, but when you end up on Amazon or in the hands of a traditional publisher, they're going to make you pick one. So just pick one and make it fit there.
Beck: You've got to categorise it.
Rosalie: You've got to categorise it because also, a great way to ruin an audience's expectations is to pick that category, they start reading it and go, ‘Well, that's not this. I don't like you now.’ That's something I had to think about all the way through.
Also, I watched a video by Bronwyn Tilley in Writers SA. She's got a little video and she shows you all her screens inside Amazon in what's called Kindle Publishing Direct. So you have your normal Amazon account, but you have to set up a different one to be a self-publisher. There's no cost to that part, but you have to think about things like the cover design, does it fit the genre? So, you might need a designer, because if you're not a designer, you can make a very terrible-looking book.
They have templates, but we've all seen them and they do all look the same. They've got templates and you could just use one. You need to think about if you want to sell those books other than on Amazon, you're going to need to buy ISBNs. You need to at least buy one for the hard copy. Amazon will give you a ISBN for their own website for free. So again, no cost. But if you want to go out of there, you need to go and understand and set up and become someone who can purchase their own ISBN. I know there are services out there that do that and now I get why because there's a lot to think about. The main thing is that the admin is more than you think it's going to be. Even if you think it's going to be a lot, it's a lot.
You also need to think about format, but you need to think about format anyway. If you were submitting to a publishing company, they've all got different submission guidelines. And I did, I had to resubmit it differently every time.
Because I am an editor by day, I know why they're valuable. So I hired an editor who hadn't read this book before for the final revision because I wanted someone to see it and say, ‘Here's what you could do to improve this book,’ or if needed, ‘Don't publish this book,’ which she didn't. She thought it was excellent.
You could just go: write book, redraft, stick it on Amazon, done. Or you can go further and think about the design of the cover and your audience and think about potentially hiring an editor – and hire them, don't ask them to do it for free. Because she was magnificent. So worth every single penny to me. So I feel good about what I put out in the world.
Then you just stick it on Amazon and upload files until it looks right.
Beck: You hired a designer in the process as well? Someone who was very into the gothic aesthetic?
Rosalie: Yes. Someone who is a goth. His name's Brent Leideritz. He's an Adelaide goth, I would call him. If you were in the goth scene, you'd probably know who he is, and he does a lot of risqué photography, so don't Google him at work. He's very sexy and gothic. But he understands the goth aesthetic because he is one. He lives it. But that was more of a gift to myself as much as anything. I thought, ‘I may never do this again. Why not actually hire a friend who I've hired to do photo shoots for me.’ He also did a publisher's logo to put on the spine. Because I thought, ‘If I do another book, I'll have an imprint.’
I wanted someone to make a vision of what I could see. I knew that he could, and I didn't know how it worked, but what he got me to do was give him a couple of scenes that described the main character. Not giving him the stats, but find some scenes that for me, really represented who she was and what she was doing.
The cover came back and I just went, ‘How did you do that?’ For someone else it might just look like a cover, and that is an art, but for me, I was like, ‘Oh, that's magnificent. It's her, it's Anna. And the look in her eyes is just, yeah, that's how she's feeling. That's it. You nailed it.’
Also, why not have a graphic designer who's a goth, who might talk to his friends about your book?
Beck: What advice would you give to budding writers looking to emulate your path or tread in your path?
Rosalie: Start early, don't wait. Don't be unsure. It's not going to be perfect first go. Whatever you've got, if you know you've got a story in you, make sure it's your story. And I don't mean it's about me, I mean it's not, ‘I copied Lord of the Rings and pasted it in a tweet.’ If you have a story that you don't really even know how to articulate what it's about, damn well write it. Because that's how you potentially get published. You cannot get published without having the story. So write it, and write it earlier than you think, and then show it to people.
That will hurt if you're like me. That's going to come with some pain because they're not going to just go, ‘It's a perfect and radiant glow,’ but they might say some words to you that are so beautiful that the other words are worth you working with. So just do it. Just actually do it. Be prepared that it's hard slog. And as someone once said to me, ‘You need to want it, because it is hard.’ I've never met any writer – published or not – who has said to me, ‘Oh, it's easy.’ No. They're probably out there. I have never met them and maybe I don't want to if they have found it that easy.
Also, back up your shit.
Beck: Haha, yes, that’s right. Now that you’ve published it, give us a taste of how good that feeling is.
Rosalie: Wow, that's funny that I've gone speechless for that one. But maybe that's the point because it’s not easy to articulate and it's deeply personal. And that's why I said start writing because if you're someone with a story in you, the feeling you get when you realise you are fully at ease with this thing as a piece, you want it in the world, is like it is a whole of your heart safely exposed. When you get to that point, whether it's through a traditional method or doing it yourself, it makes you stand up and it's just like it washes over you. Not even a relief. But it is a wash of a deeper thing.
It's because that feeling is so good. Little Rosalie would pass out at the idea of it. But for me, it's calmer than that. As grown up me, I know what I did to get here. I didn't just write it and chuck it up and hope for the best. I took my craft seriously and with my background, I'd say that's really hard to do, to actually give yourself time – never mind money – time and attention to take yourself seriously on something that's not just about putting money into a mortgage or rent or whatever. It's magnificent. There's a massive calmness about it.
It's quite nice.
Giveaway
The winner of Pip Drysdale’s thriller, The Paris Affair, is Georgie Waters. I’ve emailed you, Georgie!
This week’s book giveaway is a copy of Helen Hoang’s romance novel, The Heart Principle. Pop your name and email address in here to go into the draw.
Playlist of the Week
Spiking the office Xmas party punchbowl:
1. Frosty Bounce - Diplo, Angger Dimas, Nicky Da B
2. Christmas Every Day - Simple Plan
3. Back to the Beat – Jingle Bells Version - Astromar
4. Santa Tell Me - Ariana Grande
5. O Come All Ye Faithful - Weezer
6. Winter Wonterland - Sam Feldt
7. Sleigh Ride - Miley Cyrus
8. Christmas In Hollis - Run-D.M.C.
9. Troll The Halls - Aquadrop
10. WAWA – Christmas Edition - Party Favor
11. Christmas by the Phone - Good Charlotte
12. This Christmas - Christina Aguilera
13. Cold December - Kaskade
14. Deadbeat Holiday - Green Day
15. Christmas Without You - Ava Max